sober

sometime we wonder how far is far, how close is close? these are some limitations that we ourselves do not know, if we had done enough, or had we went overboard? its until when the effects set in do we realise what exactly are we doing?

sometimes we fear something in our heart, but our mind constantly tell us that we will be able to overcome it. mind over heart, or vice versa? we humans are such wonderful yet queer creatures that we cannot explain or accurately pin point the reason why. ambiguous cases do appear here and there, without reason, without warning.

i don't know why and when thoughts and reflections got into me. maybe i was having too much fun that i didn't really care that much. it was only when i was still sober, while on the verge to getting drunk that i began to think alot, after all that highness there'll be a low down, just like having a ying in every yang. i always believe life is like a sine graph, it goes up and down. and i suddenly feel that it is during life's "down" period that we start to self-reflect and change for the better, well hopefully...

what i reflected just now, is that i had ignored quite a few people's emotion and natural characteristic, which is hard for them to change. maybe the extrovert side of me got over myself too much that i alway try to engage people. like what henry told me, some people may not like it. it's natural for them, and they may dislike to do certain stuffs. i feel that i had been selfish enough for things to go my way while sacrificing others' feelings. it's like forcing my way through a wall against other's natural characteristic. yes my bad =(

anyway i hope that these people will not hold it against me. (no i'm not pin-pointing to any particular person pls! it just in a general context..) sometimes i get too firm in my decision and beliefs that it became natural for me to hit the wall. oh well, life is such a wonder!

okay so i think i need to rush projects now. wait, its a must! hah! gonna chao pia projects liao, esp for IEF, and society projs too! ohmy! oh and we spring cleaned the society room. it look so bright and vibrant with the new coat of paint on. next up is to arrange everything. woots! something to look forward to in the next one year in bAs. =)

and to my dear feli, clemmy and gifford. don't be disheartened by the recruitment eh? like what caleb wrote in the Gy blog, we should cherish the moments and friendships we had. remember Yamatai KILL! KILL! KILL! maybe next year some of the freshies will be able to cont the legacy! =)

alright i better turn in now, meeting tmr.............